jejjala.com

thunder and lightning

I woke up at 5 AM or so this morning to a crazy lightning storm. It was actually kinda frightening. The crackle and sizzle of the lightning strikes—very close to my apartment—was pretty deafening.

Against my better judgment, I decided to head into work for a couple hours around noon. As I got a few blocks away, I could smell char. The baptist church right up the street from my office was totally gutted and still smoldering.

Check out the frontpage story in the Sun. And the requisite YouTubery.

niche marketing

Hampden is apparently a hotspot of automobile, stealth, movie marketing. On my 15-minute walk home from work, I saw bumper stickers that said “Harvey Dent for Gotham” and “Palpatine for Senate” on cars parked a block apart.

Hmmm.

i hate baltimore

That is all.

 

 Stephen Malkmus - Baltimore: Play Now

today’s news

In my formative years I remember walking to the street corner to buy the Post for 25 cents. One measly, non-statehood quarter.

The newsstand price is now 50 cents, up from 35 cents in 2007. And it hasn’t been 25 cents since 2001. The 7-11 on my way to work this morning charged me 75 cents (plus tax.) I was told by the shopkeeper that the 50% price increase is the standard Baltimore markup, and he pointed out that ”prices may vary in areas outside metropolitan Washington.” He claims to pay 70 cents for each paper, and thus only make 5 cents profit on each. 

I usually read it online for free, but that’s precisely the problem. Newsprint advertising just ain’t what it used to be.

cake theory

At work, it is commonplace to receive a company-wide email, informing us employees that there’s cake in the kitchen that’s up for grabs. We even have a monthly Cake Day to celebrate office birthdays, anniversaries, milestones, etc.

Today, I replied all with the following helpful graphic:

I doubt my message was well-received. Previously, I had emailed the ‘all employees’ distribution list, saying that there was a “special treat” in the kitchen. In fact, I was bored, waiting in an airport ~900 miles away, and was just trying to amuse myself. In my head, I had this ridiculous image of the entire company rushing to the kitchen, scouring it for whatever it is I could have left. And that’s exactly what happened.

the summer me

before	after

internet please entertain me

internet please entertain me

(EDIT: #2 hit on Google!)

tee vee, not TB

I spent almost the entire weekend recovering from the Worst Cold Ever. I started feeling ill last weekend and got progressively worse until I could barely function by Friday. Of course, I had already missed some work and had to go in, since the boss lady is going to Costa Rica for two weeks and I’m her backup. (My previous boss used the term ‘in charge’—as a noun—for that. It drove me absolutely insane…)

I left my apartment twice, both times to pop over to the corner store for provisions, e.g., cough medicine, canned soup. Walking back along Falls Road to my apartment on Saturday, someone tried to sell me pot. On Sunday, a vagrant tried to sell me Crest Whitestrips. Seriously. I took it as an affront to my oral hygiene. I immediately went home and brushed and flossed. Seriously.

After wrestling with the decision for weeks, I caved in and called Comcast on Saturday night to order Showtime. I watched the first season of Dexter on DVD with my former roommate a few months ago and after becoming addicted, I finally decided I couldn’t wait another three months to watch Season 2. I figured that as long as I spend less than ~$25 (the price of the DVDs), it would be worthwhile, since I probably wouldn’t watch more than once. I thought about downloading them, but they’re not available on Zune Marketplace, and I don’t have a TV out on my laptop. I’m not sure if the customer service rep. at Comcast felt bad for me, because I explained that I’m sick and bored and just want to watch a specific show on Showtime. Either way, she hooked me up with free HBO and Showtime! Bonus points, I can watch This American Life now too.

This recent development will surely exacerbate my new life as a shut in since becoming a DC émigré…

actual excerpt from an e-mail i sent today

I’m really starting to hate the new Baltimore me. He’s boring, doesn’t drink, tries to cozy up to [people] he doesn’t particularly like, and thinks he’s better than everyone else. The old me was not quite as boring, lushed it up with the best of them, was an asshole to people he didn’t like, and thought he was better than everyone else. God, how I miss him!

Before I know it, I’ll be 30, living in Suckville, a.k.a. Baltimore, drinking Natty Boh (not in a hip, ironic way), and clinging to the faded image of myself once being cool and popular, though even that’s a stretch.

Oh, woe.

Cheetoes are overrated.

a sad chronology

May 11, 2:30 PM, 65.3°F, 0.00″ rainfall

Excitement abounds. I slept thirteen hours last night due to allergies, lack of regular sleep from the week, and malaise. But now I am alert and well. I called my mom this morning and wished her a Happy Mother’s Day. She appreciated the flowers. I exit my apartment to meet my friend and his sister before going to catch the Radiohead show at Nissan Pavilion tonight. I’ve never seen them live before, and though I’m perhaps only a casual fan, I’m psyched.

May 11, 4:30 PM, 59.5°F, 0.06″ rainfall

I’m now in DC, heading to Target to meet friend. (Damn, I miss living and working next to Target!) I still make the trek down to DC about once a week or so. It’s getting tiring, especially on weekends, since the MARC train doesn’t run. I instead take the light rail to BWI and hop on the bus to the Greenbelt metro station. I did have the forethought to pop over to the store on my way and buy a new umbrella. Good move!

May 11, 7:30 PM, 54.7°F, 0.65″ rainfall

Yikes, the rain is coming down! Flip-flops were a poor choice. Meh, at least I don’t have lawn seats for the concert. “Rain or shine” my ticket says. Those poor saps! Traffic on I-66 W is a mess. The opening band The Liars takes the stage.

May 11, 8:30 PM, 54.1°F, 0.92″ rainfall

Intermission at the concert, but we’re still on the road. Bumper to bumper cars and torrential rain. It’s just miserable. One of Radiohead’s criteria for this tour was that the locations be ‘green,’ which includes public transportation to the venue. There is no public transportation to Nissan, and they even charge a mandatory $6 per ticket parking fee. The band’s website helpfully urges concert-goers to carpool instead. True enough, most cars seem have 2-3 passengers.

May 11, 9:30 PM, 53.5°F, 1.33″ rainfall

We’ve been traveling around circuitous detours near Nissan Pavilion, since flooding has closed off the major entryway to the parking lot. Still bumper to bumper, still pouring rain. The Bush administration should explore using this as torture; I’m ready to break. I feel really bad for my friend’s sister, who has been driving all this time and earlier in the day made the trip down from Philly.

May 11, 10 PM, 52.5°F, 1.67″ rainfall

It’s hopeless. Radiohead is already five songs into their set and we’re nowhere closer to gaining entrance. Even if we do make it in, we’re liable to only catch the last couple songs plus encores. Then we’d have to wait another several hours in traffic to get back to DC. Even after spending $72 for a ticket, it just doesn’t add up. Sodden and dejected, we turn around, but not before first stopping for directions and to fill up the tank. The gas station attendant tells us that a steady stream of cars have already passed through doing the same.

May 11, 11 PM, 51.8°F, 2.15″ rainfall

The concert ends just as we arrive back in DC. It only took an hour to get back, instead of the four to get down to within a mile of the venue. Radiohead and Live Nation, the concert promoters, should buy carbon offset credits for every ticketholder to assuage their eco-consciences.

May 12, 6 AM, 45.9°F. 3.13″ rainfall

I awake with a crimped neck from sleeping on a couch that’s a foot too short for my height. I did not sleep well. All told, I spent $100 and eight hours the day before and have nothing to show for it. I hold no hope for a refund, but I plan to call/write Nissan Pavilion anyway later today. In a few moments I must trudge back off into the rain and start my week.